Friday, April 28, 2006

I’d like to say that I’ve been really really busy and that’s why my attempt at starting up this blog has, for all intents and purposes, failed. That’s not exactly true. Mostly, I’m lazy and don’t have too much to write about.

T is still in Canada. I went up to visit him last weekend and what was supposed to be a nice, romantic weekend, ended up being a miserably, rainy bitch fest. We could not stop picking at each other. I think that’s what happens when you haven’t seen someone in a long time. You build up this perfect person in your head and when you finally do get to see them, they can only disappoint. Not that this weekend was any detriment to our relationship. I am still blissfully in love with him. All this weekend did was convince me that he MUST come home. This stress of being apart is really starting to destroy us. I worry that he isn’t working as hard as he should to come back home.

This whole experience is really teaching me how much of a “do-er” I really am. I said to T while I was in Toronto that if it were me in his position, I would have been back in New York. He agreed and apologized for allowing this to go on so long. But he still had no solutions for me. It’s frustrating and if I didn’t love him so much, he’d be kicked to the curb. Unfortunately, I’m in love with him, which means that I am fucked.

On another note, I hung out with my coworker last night. We all went out to an office party, where I sipped diet coke and made snarky comments about our jobs. When all of our other coworkers went off to bigger and better parties, coworker and I stuck around to shmooze with to execs. He bought me drinks and made jokes about how he’s my other Jewish Canadian. I couldn’t help but feel like this could have ended badly. Let me allay fears. Even though I hung out with him till way past midnight, nothing happened. Maybe some harmless flirting but nothing more than that. It did make me realize that I do still kinda like him. At least, I don’t despise him and he certainly doesn’t despise me.

After the work party, he and I headed to a party thrown by his alumni association. He coerced me into going by promising that there would be drunk Canadians. I can’t pass up an opportunity to hear drunken Canuks say “Aboot” so I went. And I had a good time. It made me realize that I hadn’t really been out and certainly hadn’t been drinking, in a very long time. And it was nice to be out, meeting new people. I texted T all night though…

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love your blog and I am happy that things are going well! Please keep us posted.

Anonymous said...

Well? What's happened?

Anonymous said...

Congrats baby ;)

Cameron Sharpe said...

I just happen to be passing by when I read your post. Nice post and keep up the good work!